Last night i saw an ad that said it's product was available at CVS and other fine retailers.

Sorry i just thought that was ironic. I mean what part of CVS makes it a fine retailer. Is it the 3 for $3 cans of pringles? Or their unparalleled selections of fine beef jerkys? Perhaps it's their vast array of Tampons, or their equally impressive assortments of condoms. That's right folks in America when we think luxury we don't think Macy's Goodiva or Jaguar, no we think CVS, but not those dirty jerks over at WalGreens.

To Catch a predator

Police are cracking down on predators offering candy to kids now that school has started back. The police are setting up stings in parking lots and stuff trying to bust these perverse schmucks, but if they are in the parking lot, the battle is half lost. I mean you have to hope the kid doesn't have a sweet tooth, or the predator only has runts. I say we step up are game, I'd say crack down on any creepy vans, but i like illegal immigrants so I say we take the policing to candy stores world wide. If you own a liquor store you are held responsible if you sell to the wrong people, i think Candy Store owners should be held to these same rigorous standards. If you're selling more than 3 packs of sour patch kids to the same man in a given day, you need to be reprimanded, no grown man wants all that sour, he clearly has ulterior motives. And if anybody even tries to buy Rolos, just call the police. I'm not going crazy here, I don't think there should be a ten day waiting period for a Snickers, but maybe there should be on Zero bars. I know this could go too far and end up with the Bunny Rabbit doing time behind bars, but I think even my hoppy friend would agree that's a small price to pay for the welfare of the kids. All I'm saying is the next time I see a guy with a whole bag of dumb dumb suckers, I'm shooting first and asking questions later.

Things that make be vastly more angry than they should

Stumping my toe.

When something costs like $9.23 and i hand the cashier a ten only to find a quarter in my pocket after they've hit enter, and it takes them 2 minutes to figure out what they owe me in change. I think all the children that get left behind become cashiers.

Brain Freezes

Howie Mandel

People who stop for no apparent reason on the sidewalk. Look buddy I'm off in another world when I'm walking to work if you come to a dead stop cause your trying not to step on a crack, I will bump into you and we will both break our mammas backs.

People misquoting movies, either know the movie or shut up.

The WNBA

People who have the uncontrollable urge to correct your english anytime you say something that's not grammatically correct. Look I get it it's an impulse, but I've conquered the impulse to hit you in the face, so I need you to conquer yours.

The Fanta Commercials

People talking through movies at the movie theatre. Your voice isn't the reason people are willing to pay 8 bucks for popcorn.

The designated hitter

People who ask you a question only to Answer it themselves.
Them "hey Rusty what's your favorite color"
Me "That's a dumb question but"
Them "It's blue isn't it you wear a lot of blue I bet its blue"
Me "WRONG. It's green. Any more questions i can Trebek for you?"

The sound of a women filing her nails. I'm marrying a girl who bites her nails just so I don't have to deal with that until she divorces me.

When people who only sing and dance are called musicians.

That prepubescent girls will always get money from their parents, which means people like Zack Efron will always be famous.

AND CATS

Drug use and music

So I'm sitting in my office listening to some undeniably awesome bands, The Doors, The Who, The Rolling Stones, and even some that don't start with The. As I was listening i could't help but wonder what has happened to music? How did we go from Jimi Hendrix to the Jonas Brothers? How come the new girl singers are less concerned with sounding like janis joplin, than matching Britney in pantyless pics. I mean have we as a society really decided that we enjoy the vocal styling of James Blunt? How does music even go from the badassness of CCR to the wuss fest that is Matchbox 20?

Well after careful consideration I've come to one conclusion. Drugs. Drugs drugs and more drugs. The old guys did them, heck Keith Richards is only alive cause he has too much cocaine in his system for his heart to stop. The new singers, not as much. I mean it was an understood fact that Jim Morrison was going to be high drunk or something even cooler when he was on stage, the lead singer of the PussyCat Dolls, not so much. Now I'm not condoning drug use, i myself am not a partaker, all I'm saying is if you are going to have a drug problem, pick up a guitar. Kurt Cobain was nice enough to do that and I think that worked out for all of us.

That's why the only good music out today is Rap music. Those guys have the market cornered on weed, and thus the market cornered on good music. I think a non high Kanye West is Carlton from the Fresh Prince. Why do you think Snoop Dogg starts smoking again every time he hits the studio?

If you're slow to see the truth here I offer one undeniable example as proof. Ladies and Gentleman Aerosmith! Aerosmith use to melt faces, Steven Tyler use to work the stage like he was doing warm ups for the orgy that awaited him backstage. Then they came out and said we're off drugs we've cleaned up as a group. And then they released that song from armageddon, and then that pink song. Ladies in gentleman I rest my case.

Tray tables not in their full and upright posistions, kill millions

So i was recently on a plane and the woman FREAKED out that my tray table was still down, those attendants are like tray Nazis and i don't get it. Are we unable to make planes that can take off and land with tray tables down, is their a team of engineers working around the clock at Boeing right now trying to solve the problem? Has their ever been a plane crash and they checked the black box and the pilot was like "Oh God the guy in 14 D left his tray table down i can't control the plane we're all gonna die" I mean on a yearly basis how many planes are grounded due to faulty tray tables. I guess this was a long way of telling flight attendants everywhere the next time I'm rocking a mini coma on your plane, don't wake me up, just put my tray table up!

Today Metallica and New Kids on the Block both released new music videos. Which springs one question to mind REALLY?

What's next are we bringing back slap bracelets and hyper color shirts? Seriously give it up! Does anybody even listen to heavy metal anymore, and sorry New Kids but the name is ironic now, and it's a little creepy that your main audience is still 12 year old girls. Honestly I'm just mad MTV didn't bring back Downtown Julie Brown to introduce the new videos.